I keep trying
to feel all my feelings
away,
to allow them space
to move on and
off on their way
but it feels like they’d
just
rather stay
My feelings feelers
feel all broken
down today
but
I’m too sad to look away
too scared to even
be afraid
I watch the putrid, slippery feels
sit on my chest
tighten my breath
coil round my heart
and spoil my thoughts
And I say,
“I see you, feelings.
You’re just chemicals
from my brain.
Now please go away.
I have other things
to get done today.”
But these feels just go on forever
yawning as
they lay around
squirming inside
my hot skin, pulling and gnawing
swimming through my gut, seeing
and sawing
creasing my forehead
and folding my face like origami
making me sweat like cold salami
I don’t see an end
this feel has no tail
so I fail
to see why
I ever even
let my feelings outside
in the light of day
don’t the feels know
if only they’d behave
i wouldn’t keep on
locking
them
away?
Love this combo of whimsy and pain holding hands, this dual split merged within us, somehow makes us more than angels can imagine (as you beautifully alluded to in previous “part 4”)
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